The Art of Jetsetting

Crowds are one of those things I have a short temperament for.  It's the way they slow the rest of us down that really gets me.  As a result I've tried to pride myself on getting any mundane task done as quickly as possible.  Airports and travel is one area where I particularly thrive in these tasks because crowds often become more thick at these venues.  Until I become a person of suspicion for the TSA.  

In one of my rare efforts to fit my belongings in a classified "carry on" my bag naturally had to be searched. It's the saline solution every time.  While sifting through making sure the liquid was indeed "safe" the man in uniform came across a shiny object that caught their eye.  My three-fingered silver band ring that found its way out of my jewelry case.  Next thing you know the one uniform became three as I was interrogated inside of Lambert St. Louis International Airport on exactly what the object was.  Of course I know so much as to comply as best as possible with hopeful authority figures so I was as precise and detailed as possible:  it was my multi-fingered ring, I bought it at Urban Outfitters, normally I would wear it but it doesn't match my outfit today, it cost around $20, it's my favorite.  While being somewhat worse for the wear just one day after Mardi Gras, I realize I was not exactly the face of dignity, but it's highly doubtful my face was that close to the one of danger either.  A couple attempts at intimidating glances later I was free to go with my mutli-fingered ring left in the bag (thanks, you're a real gem, sir).  

Fortunately after such a commotion I was able to make it to the gate just in time for my boarding call.  Ticket scanned and...another pull over.  This time the bag was in question for its size.  Quite naturally it did not fit the model.  The bag had to be checked at the gate.  Who knows, maybe a few people were put out of harms way from my ring as well.  A very important lesson was learned at that moment.  Always back on the border.  The border of checked and carry-on baggage that is.  Because if you're lucky you can fit everything you want to bring in one bag while escaping the fee.

{Image Credit:  Matchbook Magazine}